Bert's Review - Cervelo P5

Being the wannabe that I am, I thought I would post a picture and drop some love. Here are my top reasons to buy the Cervelo P5.

1. Be original - just like everyone else
2. That extra 2 minutes you save on the bike will allow you to break 14:10!
3. You know you want to tell everyone just how much you paid for the damn bike.
4. The only way you can prove that you care enough about triathlon is by buying this bike. Otherwise, I have no time for you.
5. I hear the P5 actually provides additional ass comfort - which is good when I go for a long ride the day after the flashlight accidently gets lodged deep. Again.

Of course, I have never seen the P5. I couldn't afford one. Not with all the little Bert Jr's running around (and those I haven't yet met). But be cool. Buy a Cervelo. You're still going to suck, but do it in style.